Headed Home Fired Up

Sitting here at Dulles waiting to fly to SFO after four weeks visiting friends and helping my older sister, I’m eager to head back with a new game plan. Hopefully I’ve broken some old habits, like caffeine and television, and will form new ones, including more self-discipline and making movies.

During my travels, I’ve been reading The Book of Joy by the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu. One piece of advice struck me strongly: “Everyday, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.”

The Buddhist meditation on mortality elaborates on that theme:

Every moment matters…. I shall always live my life with purpose. Time never remains still, and it’s up to me to use my time in the most meaningful way. I shall live in harmony with my deeper aspirations so that when my final day arrives I will be able to leave with ease and without remorse.

But how can I “use my time in the most meaningful way”? What are my “deeper aspirations”?

Since the world seems to be ever more selfish, self-centered, tribalistic, nationalistic, and militaristic, what options do we have?

When visiting with Andy Maxwell and Sara Colm, Andy suggested, “Reach out to folks and talk face-to-face.” In a follow up conversation, Andy helped me formulate a plan: Invite old, close friends to get together, one-on-one and/or in small groups, to discuss: “What do you think about the state of the world and what can we do about it?”

To my mind we need one or more national, nonviolent, compassionate, joy-filled movements in every country to help make their country more compassionate — and more willing to cooperate with other countries to make the world more compassionate — movements that focus on winnable goals and stay together over time to move onto to new goals.

I’ve long been looking for such a movement to join. Thrive East May may be incubating such an effort. So when I return, I will get engaged in that community.

In the past I would often get discouraged and become melancholy and tired and get stoned at night and watch mindless television for hours, telling myself I need to rest and take care of myself. But creative activity can generate energy rather than deplete it.

So during my week alone outside Asheville I made a list of tasks that I want to accomplish and tracked how much time I spent on each of them. That review, as well as my reflecting on my prior life in San Francisco, led me to conclude that I need to spend less time reading or watching the news, and will try to “cut the cord” on my television.

On weekends I’ll socialize with friends, commune with Mother Nature, and maybe catch some live music or watch a movie. And I hope to socialize during the week as well, especially during meals.

Monday through Friday, I tentatively plan to devote two hours to each of the following: write, read books, correspondence (email and Facebook), read the news and other articles on the Internet, exercise and miscellaneous tasks, and then late in the evening, make movies. Those look like good 12-hour workdays to me, leaving ample time for socializing, eating, and sleeping.

With approach, I believe I can monitor myself, guard against burnout, and see if it proves to be the kind of work that is energizing.

The number of people who read and react to what I post is decreasing. Readers rarely share what I post. The reasons are likely multiple. Most people do not consider my posts to be as valuable as I do. There is a  flood of information on the Internet. And I may have alienated some people with strong opinions that they disagree with.

Occasionally, that lack of support disappoints me and I feel sorry for myself and tell myself that I was too self-indulgent in my youth, failed to develop my talents, and have made too many mistakes.

Then I tell myself, “I am good enough (and will get better), I can only do what I can do, and I am not the point — the point is to do the best I can to serve others.” And I feel better, fired up, and ready to go.

Today I tell myself that even if only 10 people read what I write, I will write as if 10,000 read it.

And I will devote more time to face-to-face dialogue that will enable me to better understand others and our world, while aiming to find more truth, justice, and beauty.

Why Movements Fail

On Facebook, Kaxu Haga, East Point Peace Academy Coordinator, posted:

Looking for resources on studying movements that FAILED. We always romanticize current and historical movements that had the best successes, but there’s so much to learn from the times that we didn’t. Books, websites, articles, anything?

He’s received a good number of valuable responses. You might want to review them on Facebook.

The one that most attracted my attention was this recommendation: The End of Protest: A New Playbook for Revolution by Micah White.

Here’s my response to his question:

Why Some Movements Succeed And Others Fail by Greg Satell sums it up very well, very briefly. His reference to the book, Join the Club, is well taken. Excellent, important book.

+++

Rachel L. Einwohner makes a distinction between a failed movement, which fails to mobilize people, and a movement failure, which fails to achieve its goal. She argues that even a failed movement may not be fruitless because “failures of some types may lead to other kinds of successes.”

+++

Violence Doesn’t Work (Most of the Time)” by Stephen Pinker

“Just think of the failed independence movements in Puerto Rico, Ulster, Quebec, Basque Country, Kurdistan, and Tamil Eelam. The success rate of terrorist movements is, at best, in the single digits.”

+++

Algerian Chronicles by Albert Camus

A beautifully written collection of articles and essays about Algeria written by Camus over a 20 year period. Though the Left ostracized him in the 50s, these works have proven eerily prescient. I wonder if Mandela read it while in prison. Many passages could be lifted verbatim and applied to today’s reciprocal terrorism. Heart-breaking book.

Any spirited movement will likely include some violence, and we need not waste our time trying to convert the violence-prone. But we need not legitimize it, and we need to learn how to conduct nonviolent demonstrations that are not disrupted by violence.

Cults, Scapegoats, Hatred, and Violence

Trump is a symptom. He’s not our primary problem. Trump reflects and reveals American values: selfishness, materialism, greed, the lust for power, the desire to dominate, scapegoating, hatred, a disposition toward violent speech and violent action, worshiping “winners,” contempt for “losers,” the quest for revenge, “It’s All About Me (and my Family).” Most Trump voters seem to embrace those values, as do do many of those who (for various reasons) did not vote for him.

The United States also affirms many positive values. Like Leonard Cohen said, “America has the best and the worst.” Over time this country has made great progress. But there’s no guarantee it will continue.

In fact, America is becoming ever more polarized, divided, and selfish. It seems our addiction to screens has worsened that trend, which will likely worsen. We’re devolving and evolving at the same time. Which trend will prevail is uncertain.

Many concerned Americans have focused on Trump and the prospect of impeachment. But it might be more productive to build one or more national nonviolent movements to overcome the devolution and nurture the evolution. For instance a massive, grassroots movement opposing the attempt to repeal Obamacare could build a network of small, face-to-face communities that would stay together over time to advance a positive, proactive agenda. But it seems the Resistance, with its negative stance, may fizzle.

Donald Trump has become a scapegoat. He is alleged to bear the blame for our state of affairs. As such, he’s the object of hate, extreme hostility, dislike, and disgust. He is demonized.

That opposition is often expressed with violent language. And just as the atmosphere of hate in Dallas contributed to the assassination of President Kennedy, violent rhetoric contributed to the shooting of Republicans on that D.C. baseball field.

One definition of violence is a vehement, intense expression of hatred.  Violent words often help to cause violent actions. That’s one reason we need non-violent communication. Yes, words matter, whether they come from Trump or his opponents.

Once again the ”left” and “right” are mirror images of the other, with each rooted in America’s Shadow, attacking hate with hate, each assured of their own righteousness with cult-like devotion to their leaders, their presumed saviors. Demons and saviors are often two sides of the same coin: blindness. Blind hatred and blind loyalty.

Blind followers overlook or defend the mistakes and faults of their leader. Those tendencies have been exhibited by many supporters of Obama, Sanders, and Clinton, who have reinforced those tendencies by failing to criticize themselves to any significant degree.

Blind opponents of Trump have failed to recognize his humanity. He is a man-child whose father stunted his emotional growth. As is human, he has many sides to his personality, including the ability, at times anyway, to be kind and courteous.

But he’s also learned that the media loves the outrageous, especially if it’s violent, whether verbal or physical. Violence is good for ratings. The media’s infatuation with over-the-top greed and violence has buttressed Trump’s worst traits in a downward spiral. I too hope he resigns or is impeached as soon as possible — before that spiral runs out of control.

We should remember, however, that he’s a creature of our social system. If cable news had not given him all that free air-time, he would not be President. If a “divide-and-conquer” dynamic did not drive our society, we wouldn’t be so polarized and he would not be President. If climbing one social ladder or another, and looking down on those below, were not central to our society, he would not be President.

Ranting and raving about “enemies” like Trump may make us feel better. It may provide some temporary relief, which is fine. But if we dwell on that anger and it crystallizes into hatred, we become distracted from the primary task at hand: systemic, fundamental transformation that is grounded in compassion.

Holistic Movement Building Workshop Set to Convene

What demands might spark a national nonviolent movement? Mahatma Gandhi,  Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Cesar Chavez, and Nelson Mandela focused on compelling issues that appealed to the self-interest of certain populations while making moral appeals to others. Are similar concerns at hand now? And how can activists support one another in their self-development? What decision-making processes might be most effective?

Those questions will be on my mind when I participate in the June 26-29 Holistic Movement Building Workshop led by Kazu Haga and  Sonya Shah. The workshop description states:

“Power without love is reckless and abusive, while love without power is sentimental and anemic.” Dr. King, Gandhi, Chavez and others envisioned a movement that harnesses the power to change policies and institutions while cultivating the love it will take to transform relationships.

What does it mean to build holistic movements for justice and healing? How do we build a movement grounded in love without giving up the power and the urgency of now? How do we dismantle systems of oppression without replicating those same patterns in our own relationships? How do we heal our wounds while transforming the systems that perpetuate them? How do we better cultivate the relationship between inner and outer transformation? What do holistic movements for justice and healing look like in terms of real practice and on the ground?

This workshop will engage these questions, explore past and current movements, and envision paradigms and practices to build more holistic movements grounded in both justice and healing. This four-day inquiry will interweave theory, discussion, experiential exercises, and a collaborative approach.

This workshop is part of the California Institute for Integral Studies’ Summer Institute, “On the Cutting Edge of Justice and Healing.”

Sonya recently reported to the registrants:

The workshop has a mixture of CIIS graduate students, undergraduate students and people from across the U.S. and abroad engaged in community based work. We hope this provides a rich container for growth,  and engaging in the subject matter.  

And Kazu posted:

Still time to apply! Really excited about the upcoming Holistic Movement Building, a four-day workshop with myself and Sonya Shah!!! Scholarships are still available. Hope to see you there!!!

Sonya Shah is Associate Professor of Interdisciplinary Studies at the California Institute of Integral Studies. With 20 years of experience in social justice education, she has been a facilitator of restorative justice processes in her family, community, schools and prison settings for nine years. She has trained hundreds of facilitators in trauma healing and a restorative modality, and helped communities design their own group healing processes nationally.

Kazu Haga is a Kingian Nonviolence trainer based in Oakland, California. Born in Japan in 1980, he has been involved in many social change movements since he was 17. He conducts regular trainings with youth, incarcerated populations and activists and is the founder and coordinator of East Point Peace Academy,

With the wealth of their experience, I trust they will guide us through a fruitful, four-day workshop. The registration fee is $425. Scholarships are available.

Martin Buber Saved My Soul

When I first read it at the age of 21, Martin Buber’s I and Thou led to a series of events that changed me profoundly, and continue to do so. My upbringing made it hard for me to express my feelings. With each reading, Buber’s book has helped open me to a new way of being, though I still have far to go.

As I understand it, the I-Thou relationship involves a spontaneous, honest, compassionate, equal, mutual dialogue that engages one’s “whole being,” during which each party is completely present, without reserve, and cares for the other unconditionally.

I take the “whole being” to refer to experiences that involve deep feelings and thoughts, the body, and the “life force,” which some call Spirit and others call God. However, it may be preverbal, beyond words, when you are left speechless. As I see it, an I-Thou interaction may involve the body, as with a warm embrace, cuddling, or sexual intercourse.  

“Mutual” is not the same as “reciprocal.” You do not give in order to receive. You give and receive at the same moment, with no regard for the future.

Nor is I-Thou a matter of helping someone so you will feel better. You may, or may not, feel better after giving. But that is not the point. You give sincerely. Any benefit to you is a byproduct, a gift.

The “I-Thou” encounter is a spiritual relationship. It happens in the air between those who are involved. It cannot be measured. Whether someone is giving, or receiving, more than the other is irrelevant. Those calculations are the result of self-centeredness.

It can happen in therapy. I would like to talk to others the way I talk to my therapist. And I would like others to talk to me in the same way.

I’ve often been frustrated when others mostly talk about themselves — their thoughts, feelings, and stories — and express little or no interest in me. Most conversations strike me as a series of monologues.

But that frustration is often a reflection of my own self-centeredness. When others appear to be self-centered in that way, they may actually be concerned about me but unable or afraid to express it. And they may have good reason to be afraid. In this world of ours, there certainly are many understandable reasons for being guarded.

The nature of my personality may be one reason others hold back when we’re together. I can seem to be distant, less than fully present. I often think before I speak, which can leave the impression that I’m less than authentic. And they may know that I can be judgmental (I’m working on that). So for those and other reasons, I shouldn’t blame others. There are many factors involved, including our society and its culture.

Regardless, the I-Thou attitude does not require the other to respond in kind. I can engage the I-Thou attitude while waiting for a mutual I-Thou relationship to emerge, if and when it does. And I can be compassionate and be a good listener. If they want to talk, I can listen, without demanding they listen to me. Maybe they really need to talk about themselves. Who am I to say?

After all, maintaining an I-Thou relationship over time is impossible. It’s like a red-hot fire that must burn out. Then we rest, fall into I-It relationships, and use others as objects.

We can also use ourselves as objects. We often reduce ourselves to instruments to achieve a goal.

But using ourselves or others as objects does not preclude I-Thou.  So long as those I-It characteristics are in the back of our minds, I-Thou can still be central. Anyway, those are my interpretations.

Buber’s book is not the only tool that loosened me up. There were many other influences, most of which go back to Germany in the 1920s and the rich cross-fertilization of thought that emerged at that time, in which Buber was immersed. Those innovators included Jacob Moreno, psychodrama; Fritz Perls, Gestalt Therapy; Wilhelm Reich, bioenergetics.

Their work contributed to what became known as the “human potential movement” in the United States, with which I became involved, at times with my peers in non-professional capacities. It’s hard to know what kind of person I would be without that movement. But I believe I’m better as a result, for which I will be eternally grateful. And most of all, I’m grateful to Martin Buber.

I and Thou

Since 1923, Martin Buber’s poetic masterpiece, I and Thou, has had an enormous impact. As Nick J. Watson wrote:

Similar to a number of his predecessors, such as Blake, Dostoyevsky and Pascal, Buber foresaw the desacralisation of western society…. He believed that modern thinking, characterized by secularism, scientism and rampant individualism had become so entrenched in modern life that humanity was becoming more and more isolated from God and each other.

According to My Jewish Learning:  

In I and Thou, Buber describes two kinds of relationships, the “I-It”, and the “I-Thou”. The I-It relationship is one based on detachment from others and involves a utilitarian approach, in which one uses another as an object. In contrast, in an I-Thou relationship, each person fully and equally turns toward the other with openness and ethical engagement. This kind of relationship is characterized by dialogue and by “total presentness.” In an I-Thou relationship, each participant is concerned for the other person.

Pearls of Wisdom includes a brief selection of passages from I and Thou, including:

To man the world is twofold, in accordance with his twofold attitude….

Thou can only be spoken with the whole being….

I-It can never be spoken with the whole being….

I perceive something. I am sensible of something. I imagine something. I will something. I feel something. I think something….

This and the like together establish the realm of It.

But the realm of Thou has a different basis.

When Thou is spoken, the speaker has no thing for his object…. Thou has no bounds…. He has indeed nothing.….

Man travels over the surface of things and experiences them. He extracts knowledge about their constitution from them: he wins an experience from them. He experiences what belongs to the things….

These present him only with a world composed of It and He and She and It again…

If I face a human being as my Thou, and say the primary word I-Thou to him, he is not a thing among things, and does not consist of things.

This human being is not He or She, bounded from every other He and She, a specific point in space and time within the net of the world; nor is he a nature able to be experienced and described, a loose bundle of named qualities. But with no neighbor, and whole in himself, he is Thou and fills the heavens. This does not mean that nothing exists except himself. But all else lives in his light…

I become through my relation to the Thou…

But this is the exalted melancholy of our fate, that every Thou in our world must become an It…. As soon as the relation has been worked out or has been permeated with a means, the Thou becomes an object among objects… Genuine contemplation is over in a short time; now the life in nature, that first unlocked itself to me in the mystery of mutual action, can again be described, taken to pieces, and classified — the meeting-point of manifold systems of laws…. The human being who was … only able to be fulfilled, has now become again a He or a She, a sum of qualities, a given quantity with a certain shape…. But so long as I can do this he is no more my Thou…

…The It is the eternal chrysalis, the Thou the eternal butterfly….

…These are the two basic privileges of the world of It. They move man to look on the world of It as the world in which he has to live, and in which it is comfortable to live, as the world, indeed, which offers him all manner of incitements and excitements, activity and knowledge. In this chronicle of solid benefits the moments of the Thou appear as strange lyric and dramatic episodes, seductive and magical, but tearing us away to dangerous extremes, loosening the well-tried context, leaving more questions than satisfaction behind them, shattering security — in short, uncanny moments we can well dispense with. For since we are bound to leave them and go back into the “world,” why not remain in it? Why not call to order what is over against us, and send it packing into the realm of objects?…

It is not possible to live in the bare present. Life would be quite consumed if precautions were not taken to subdue the present speedily and thoroughly. But it is possible to live in the bare past, indeed only in it may a life be organised. We only need to fill each moment with experiencing and using, and it ceases to burn.

And in all the seriousness of truth, hear this: without It man cannot live. But he who lives with It alone is not a man.

On the Road

Now that I’m retired, before I return to San Francisco and sink my teeth into one project or another, I’m traveling for five weeks. First I went to Seattle to see how Brandon Faloona and his family are doing. The answer was: very well. Brandon likes his new job and his wife, Kristen, has done a marvelous job homeschooling their children. They study hard, have learned a lot, and are totally into baseball. While I was there, the elder co-chaired, with a peer, a global, kid-led Plant for the Planet meeting and refereed two girls soccer games (for money!). And the younger performed a piano solo that he composed at a recital with fellow students.

When I returned to San Francisco for three days, I stopped drinking coffee — partly because I knew I wouldn’t have access to good espresso on my East Coast visit, and partly because I prefer not to be addicted to anything and feel more grounded when I don’t drink coffee, Fortunately I had largely recovered from the withdrawal symptoms before I arrived at my older sister, Sara’s, house in northern Virginia to help her prepare for a sudden move to another residence.

After a few days with her, I headed south through the Blue Ridge Mountains to visit with old friends from San Francisco, Sara Colm and Andy Maxwell, who are homesteading a beautiful, sizable piece of land in southern Virginia.  A few days there helped me become more relaxed each day.

Now I’m in  Asheville, NC, where Rena Lindstrom, an old friend from Mexico, will give me a tour later today, after which I’m foot-loose before I go help my sister move on June 21 and fly back to SFO on June 24.

When I get back home, I’m still very optimistic about the Holistic Movement Building workshop and Thrive East Bay, both of which I discussed in Wade’s Journal. With Sara’s help, I’m learning how to make movies and hope to engage that medium once I’m settled.

Concerning the state of the world, it’s an open question for me whether we’re on a downward spiral of increasing selfishness (see “It’s All About Me (and My Family”) or will sustain humanity’s history of social progress. The hard time Trump is getting is cause for hope, but the warning signs are ominous, especially the growing use of social media, which may be causing serious harm.

Following are some photos and videos from my travels so far:

Seattle 2017
Ruby’s Place